20+ wheelchair jokes

20+ wheelchair jokes

20+ wheelchair jokes

I recently started dating a woman in a wheelchair, and I stood her up.

Not surprisingly that’s when she fell for me…and you know what, it became a bit of a drag…but now we’re on a roll.

What’s the hardest part about cooking a vegetable?

Fitting the wheelchair in the oven.

What does a shopping cart and a wheelchair have in common?

They both can be used to carry vegetables….

A wife says to her husband

… “I don’t like you pushing me around all the time and talking behind my back”

Husband say “Well honey what do you expect you’re in a wheelchair”

People keep pushing me around and calling me lazy…

I don’t care what they say though this wheelchair is the best thing I ever bought!

So an old Jewish man dies

So an old Jewish man dies and as per his last wish, his son goes to the newspaper publisher and asks, “How much for an obituary in your newspaper?”

Publisher says, “$5 per word”.

The son says, “Publish ‘Jacob Goldberg Dead’ “.

The publisher says, “We require minimum 6 words”.

So the son says, “In that case make it ‘Jacob Goldberg Dead, Wheelchair For Sale’

I saw a guy in a wheelchair being made fun of

I told him to stand up for himself.

What do you call a nun in a wheelchair

Virgin Mobile

What did Steven hawking say when he first got his wheelchair?

I can’t stand being in this

What’s the worst pick up line to use on someone in a wheelchair?

did it hurt when you fell from heaven?

20+ wheelchair jokes

There’s a new wheelchair party forming

But it doesn’t really stand for anything.

(At least it’ll always have a spokes person)

Hey baby did you fall from heaven?

Or is that just how your parents explain the wheelchair?

Mexican word of the day: wheelchair

Theirs only 1 taco left, so wheel chair.

I knew you’d come crawling back

the minute I stole your wheelchair

A guy in a wheelchair sped over my foot.

“You better watch where you’re going next time.” I told him.

He said, “I’m handicapped, you can’t do anything.”

I said, “No, you’re handicapped, you can’t do anything.”

Went to see the worst faith healer ever last night…

He was so bad, a man in a wheelchair got up and walked out.

A bloke in a wheelchair stole my camouflage stuff

I told him ‘you can hide but you can’t run

I had a friend in a wheelchair but i had to let him go
Now hes going downhill fast

What should you do before cooking the vegetables?

Remove the wheelchair

My wife left me

According to her, she is sick of me talking behind her back and pushing her around.

In my defence, she’s in a wheelchair.

What’s the worst thing about eating vegetables?

Putting them back in the wheelchair when you’re done

The wife told me she’s sick of me pushing her around and talking behind her back.

I said “Well you are in a wheelchair”

Wheelchair athletes have just been banned from the Paralympics

They tested positive for WD40

I knew she’d come crawling to me..

I mean, I DID steal her wheelchair

What’s the only part of a vegetable you can’t eat?

The wheelchair…

Which part of a vegetable isn’t edible?

His wheelchair.


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